Raindrops On My Windowpane
by JoAT.Nat.MoN
Summary: I've been questioning your existence, my sanity, and...our love." Bella just can't believe all that has happened. She befriends Jasper, eager to open up. But as Jasper falls out with Alice and in with Bella, life will surely take quite a turn...JxB
1. Slow Google

Me: Well, I am a little slow with my brain lately so this is just to keep my writing spirit up. Take no mind of it if you don't want to.

Jasper: But this sounds good!

Elizabeth: Yeah! It does!

Me: Pah. Anyway, what I always say, onward! Also, kinda during Twilight…yeah…

Disclaimer by Edward: She does not own it. If she did, we would all be dead. Haha.

Summary: "I've been questioning your existence, my sanity, and...our love." Bella just can't believe all that has happened. She befriends Jasper, eager to open up. But as Jasper falls out with Alice and in with Bella, life will surely take quite a turn...JxB

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Bella's POV

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"You should go hunt…," I murmured to him softly.

"I disagree," Was his reply. "I will hunt at the moment you are not so accident prone."

I snorted; a very unladylike sound.

We were currently resting in peace, occupying the space of my small bed. I was wrapped in my blankets only because Edward was too paranoid to let me sleep near him. He was too cold, he had said.

"What?" He asked gently, his eyes locking onto mine.

"When am I ever not accident prone?" I questioned.

He pursed his lips for a moment and opened his mouth to say something, closing it again. Finally, he decided on something to say. "True," he answered, frowning and sighing. "Really true."

I grinned in the darkness, knowing that he could probably see. I had won this battle. My smile soon melted off my face as the day's events replayed for me. I had been dating Edward for a few months and still, this whole vampire business, managed to surprise me. A lot. The rapid moving, no need to breathe, all of it!

I guess I just…didn't believe.

"What's wrong?" He asked, taking my face in his cool hands.

His worried eyes searched my blank ones for some answer to his question. I decided to lie.

"Just…tired I suppose. The day was long…" I answered, drooping my eyelids a bit.

He nodded his head, playing into my lie. "Yes. A long day I would agree. And you are right. I will hunt when you wake up in the morning. It's Saturday tomorrow. We have all day together." He grinned at me and played with a strand of my hair.

"When do you think you'll be back?" I asked.

"Tomorrow, Alice will come over around mid-afternoon to inform Charlie that you are staying at our house. Then, she will bring you at the house and I will meet you there. We will be able to spend time with my family. Esme really enjoys your opinions on a lot of the things that she does." He answered.

I could practically hear his smile in the darkness. My favorite crooked smile that I loved. His cool lips shaped themselves to my warm ones, and Edward pulled away moments later.

"You really should sleep," He whispered, pulling my closer. "I'm interrupting your sleep pattern."

"My sleep pattern can adjust," I mumbled, closing my eyes.

He chuckling silently, but I knew that I would not succumb to sleep. And if by some miracle of God, I did mange to get to sleep, I would be haunted by fitful dreams. What was it like for me to date a vampire? It was more a fantasy than a reality, and on those rare sunny days, only pictures lining my locker of the Cullen's(and the Hale's) reminded me that this was my life.

Not a dream.

* * *

As promised, to my dissatisfaction, Edward was gone when I woke up. Though, it did give me time to do all the research I needed. I wanted to see if anyone was as crazy as I was…someone that knew and believe in vampires. Pulling on a pair of sweats and a t-shirt, I managed to put my hair into a ponytail while going down the stairs.

I am a wonderful multi-tasker!

My breakfast consisted of two pop tarts, heated up in the microwave. A note on the table was from Charlie, explaining how he and Billy were going to go fishing. He also mentioned that Jacob might be coming up to look at my truck. I had to admit that my truck had been acting funny lately, and it was really pissing me off.

I took to the stairs two at a time, and by some luck, didn't fall once. Stumbled, but didn't fall. I felt extremely proud of myself. Turning on my computer, excuse me, laptop, I laid down on my bed and waited for it to boot up. It was a gift from Phil. Traditionally, the newly weds were supposed to get presents, but Phil just wanted me to feel that he did love me.

I began on Google. I was searching anything I could find on the vampires and the cold ones, anything I could use to prove that maybe I was crazy, and Edward didn't exist and I could go back to being how I have always been. Just me.

Bella Swan, normal teenage girl. Plain, mousy, very bright, yet so dim.

Maybe I'm in denial. That would be better than waking up one morning and realizing that it all wasn't real. Having this build in my chest was not something I wanted.

Google, eventually, popped up. Thank God. I was nearly driving myself mad.

All I could manage to find on Google for two hours, was old stories. It was all useless. I shut my laptop angrily and set it on my floor. Huffing, I knew that I was sulking.

Checking the clock, I realized that Alice would be here any minute.

Wait. That's it.

Who knows better about emotion than Mr. Emotion Man himself? Jasper! That's who I needed to talk to.

I will admit that he scared me a little at first. His blood thirsty nature and what not, but I knew that he would understand better than anyone.

But would he tell anyone? Would Alice see it? Would Edward hear it? Will he speak it, or keep my thoughts, and possibly our thoughts, to himself.

A car honking pulled me out of my reverie. It was Alice's Porsche. I threw random clothes in a bag and took the bag down to the door. I put my shoes on and ran out into the rain.

Oh. It was raining. I must've been more lost in my own mind than I thought.

I opened the passenger door, not minding Alice, and set my stuff on my lap, shutting the door.

"Hey, Alice. Does Charlie know I'm staying at your house?" I asked, clicking my seatbelt on.

"Yes, but I'm not Alice," A distinct southern drawl coated his voice as I turned, with surprise, to look at him.

"Oh. Hi Jasper." I said, thoroughly confused.

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Me: Yeah…so there's that.

Bella: Do I have problems?

*utter silence*

Bella: Well!?!?

Me: Right. Review as you see fit.


	2. Talking to Mr Emotion Man

Me: Hm. I didn't expect anyone to review…I'm a little surprised…

Jasper: Don't trust yourself to write that good?

Me: Mm…I suppose. Anyway as I always say…

Edward: Onward! *smiles innocently*

Me: *flips him the bird and mocks his smile*

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight! Mwahaha…But I own my iPod! YESH! Ipod touch babeh!

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Jasper's POV

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I was sitting on the couch, reading a book on the Civil War when Edward came into the house. It was about five in the morning, and I looked up at him, raising an eyebrow.

"What's up, Ed?" I asked, closing my book, but keeping my place with one of my slim, pale white fingers.

"Where is everyone?" He asked, confused. He tilted his head to the side and tried listening.

"Hunting," I answered going back to my book.

"Damn," He cursed silently.

"What?" I asked.

"I need to go hunting. Really bad. What about you?" Edward asked, obviously wondering why I was here and not out hunting as well.

"I hunted yesterday," I answered lifting my head so he could see my clear golden irises.

"Do you think…I mean, I need…," he sighed, exasperated.

I pursed my lips. The emotions that were eminating off him were obviously swirling around an internal struggle. Trust, worry, a little anger splashed in. I felt them all, and could view them as different colors moving around. Dark blue for trust, deep lavender for worry, and finally some bits of red for the anger.

He sighed again, running a hand through his hair. "I told Bella that Alice would pick her up mid-afternoon. Around lunch time of course, possibly a bit earlier. But…" His eyes trailed to me for a moment. "She's not here."

His voice took on a sour tone. I raised an eyebrow at him.

"And…?" I asked, waving my hand for him to continue.

"I want you to pick her up and bring her here until the rest of them get here. Can you…handle that?" He asked carefully.

I narrowed my eyes at him. Obviously, my brother lacked trust in me. I closed my book forcefully and slammed it down on the table. Thank god it didn't break. Esme would have killed me.

"Of course I can, _brother_," I spat at him angrily.

I stood up and headed for the garage.

"It's too early," Edward called at me.

"I don't really care. Just go hunt." I muttered, grabbing the keys to Alice's Porsche on my way out.

I backed out of the drive quickly, and I saw a flash of Edward as he disappeared into the forest.

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I arrived at Bella's minutes later. I sat out there, listening, and letting my temper go down. None of them would forgive me if something happened to Bella. I matched my breathing to her breathing resonating from her room. She seemed…pissed? Angry? Confused? Emotions I never witnessed before from her or my family stuck with me. Doubt? Unbelieving?

I heard her huff angrily, and I knew that it was time to let her know that I was here. I leaned back in my seat and honked the horn. I saw her go to the window and then I heard her throwing random clothes in a bag. It had just started raining moments later, and she came out with out an umbrella. Maybe she didn't know? Was out of it for a bit perhaps? I grinned. I could handle this.

She ran out to the car and opened the passenger door not even looking my way.

"Hey, Alice. Does Charlie know?" She asked closing the door quickly, and placing her stuff in her lap.

"Yes, but I'm not Alice," I answered softly.

She turned to look at me, and I felt surprise emitting from her.

"Oh. Hi Jasper." She answered, her face twisting up with confusion.

I chuckled and put the car into drive backing out quickly and whipping around to go back home.

"Sorry it's not Alice or anyone else. They all went hunting, but I went yesterday." I told her, smiling over in her direction.

"I see." Was her reply.

The car drive home, though only a few minutes, felt like forever. I didn't want to taste her blood…at least, I didn't think so. No, this was something entirely different. I wanted to protect her; keep her safe if anything. To prove to my brother, and my entire family, that I could handle this.

Finally, we pulled into the drive and I went into the garage to get out of the rain. I stopped the car, opened my door, and ran around to her side to let her out.

"Oh. Thanks, Jasper." She said grinning at me.

Her presence was intoxicating, and I couldn't help grinning back. I took her bag of stuff, with her permission of course, and ran it up to Edward's room. When I came back downstairs, she was sitting in a chair. I sat on the couch and picked up my book to continue reading.

I was halfway through my book before new emotions overrode me. Hesitation? Worry? I looked up at Bella and her chocolate eyes met my golden ones.

"Anything the matter?" I asked softly, setting my book down.

"Well, you know that I've never been quite…comfortable around you…," she began.

I nodded my head; of course I did. Edward made a point to remind me a lot.

"But…I need someone to talk to…someone who will understand how I am feeling and where I am coming from…could you…listen to me? I don't want you to laugh…" She muttered, biting her lip.

I patted the seat on the couch next to me and she hesitantly rose, and sat down next to me. I turned my body to face her.

"I'm all ears," I said.

"Well, it's just…it all feels like a dream…like I'm going to wake up and you all will be gone. I really don't want that. I know that I love Edward and every one of you. I don't want to realize that none of this is real and be hurt by it so much…" She whispered.

I nodded my head at her, completely understanding.

"Sometimes, it does feel like a dream. All this super speed and powers like superheroes, it is very overwhelming. I understand what you are feeling completely, and I do understand."

And I really did understand. If Edward were here, he would reassure her he was not leaving and then not understand at all, making her withdraw in herself even more.

"You don't have to worry about anything. I will always be here for you, no matter what. All of us will." I said, smiling gently at her.

Her eyes, glassy as she looked at me, brightened immensely.

"Thank you! Thank you for understanding…you have no idea what it means to me!" She exclaimed. Then she hugged me.

I was surprised by this, but eventually I did hug her back. Her chocolate tresses smelled like strawberries, a fruit I used to enjoy very much. She leaned back away from me and began biting her lip again. Worry came out of her again.

"What is it?" I questioned, confused now.

"No one…will know about this will they? I want it to be a secret…I want to be able to talk to you...share things with you. I want you and me to be friends." She said.

I chuckled at her.

"We already are friends. And as for my lips and my mind, they are sealed, as long as you can keep your lips shut." I answered, poking her nose.

"Well, I don't know about my dreams…I do sleep talk…but alright then. By the way, what are you reading?" She asked.

I began telling her how I had participated in the Civil war when I was turned, and I wanted to know how it did end out. She seemed actively interested, asking questions when I felt her confusion, and finally understanding as to why I was reading it.

"Are any of your friends in there?" She asked abruptly.

I smiled at her.

"I didn't have many friends in the war. All of my friends were seventeen and still at home when I started out in the war. Plus, if you made friends in the war, you were bound to lose them eventually. There were many I conversed with easily, and I enjoyed their company, but I did not have any friends, to answer your question."

She frowned; something that did not belong on her pale, heart shaped face.

"You must have been so lonely."

I chuckled. Always thinking about others. I was…happy she was so concerned.

"I suppose I was. But I made it up for being the best I could be. The best I could be to my troops; my family." I said.

I glanced at the clock. It had been an hour and a half since I picked her up. Someone was bound to come soon.

A new set of emotions launched themselves at me. Worry and fear. My face contorted around my frown.

"What is it?" Bella asked, poking my cheek.

She seemed so carefree around me now, but maybe that was because she now knew me better.

"Edward is coming. He didn't…trust me to do this. He doesn't think I can handle it, but I did a good job didn't I?" I asked, my eyes searching hers.

She grinned at me.

"Of course!" She answered happily.

And we both got up off the couch, ready to greet Edward when he came through the door.

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Me: Aha. This is dedicated to…Elizabeth I suppose for being so forceful on me. Shoving me down and telling me, 'TYPE!'

Elizabeth: WEEE!!! YAY!

Jasper: Review as always!


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